Page 71 - Book11E

Whichever method you choose, you may find your decision changes from time to time. You may view things differently after five, ten, or fifteen years. The important thing is that you discuss it together so each partner understands the other partner’s wishes.
Once you’ve decided where the money is coming from, you’ll need to decide who does the work, that is, who pays the bills, fills out the forms, and makes the phone calls when bills don’t reconcile. The per- son who is best at numbers is not always the person who wants to do the legwork so talk about it together and decide how the responsibility is best divided. The decision should have nothing to do with gender.
How the Previous Family Fits In
Former family members stay financially linked for a long time, even after one or both partners remarry, and even if there are no children from the first marriage. If there are children, the links last even longer. The chal- lenge is to fulfill the financial obligations owed to family members from the first marriage while building a sound
financial base for the new family. Here are a few tips to keep in mind.
1 . Alimony can become a source of
stress . Try having the bank transfer
the necessary amount to the previous
partner’s account directly. Transferring
between accounts at the same or even other banks is a service provided by most banks now. By doing it automatically, you avoid having to think about it every month.
2 . Remarriage often brings a change in where children reside .
Children may request to move because one parent is now better off financially or because they don’t get along with the new stepparent.
3 . Children shouldn't be messengers . Don’t be tempted to turn chil- dren into the go-betweens by asking them to give messages to the other
Financial Decisions When Remarrying 63
Your children need your presence more than your presents.
—Jesse Jackson